For Paul, it’s smells. For me, it’s sounds.
“Fill yourself with silence, you will find life,
And your body shall flourish upon earth.”
This quote from the Instruction of Amenemope is something that’s been on my mind for a while.
There isn’t enough silence in life, literally and figuratively. All day, everyday, all the spaces are filled with sound or noise. It grates on me to hear it. It makes me lose my patience, it makes me agitated. Sometimes on bad days when I’m stressed the wrong kind of noise makes me feel like my last nerve has been laid bare.
When I’m out in public I usually have my earphones firmly lodged in my ear to drown out the outside world. At least I get music that I like instead of whatever cacophony is playing (traffic, people, cell phones ringing…). But it’s not quiet.
“Do not get into a quarrel with the argumentative man
Nor incite him with words;
Proceed cautiously before an opponent,
And give way to an adversary;
Sleep on it before speaking,
For a storm come forth like fire in hay is
The hot-headed man in his appointed time.”
It’s also the way that I have to have something to say. I have to have an opinion. I have to share my thoughts. But once something is said, you can’t pull it back into your mouth. I hate that foot-in-mouth feeling; for me it’s pretty much the worst kind of shame.
Part of it could be that the feeling that you didn’t get the last word and could is extremely frustrating. Almost everyone has probably thought of a great comeback (or a way to diffuse) an argument or insult after the fact. So the choice is satisfying the urge, and very possibly continuing whatever the problem was, or stewing a little and letting go.
“Something else of value in the heart of God
Is to stop and think before speaking.”
There is reference in Egyptian wisdom liturature to “the silent man”; one who is calm and thoughtful. Sometimes it’s hard work for me to keep my mouth closed and not respond heatedly to an argument or situation. But I’ve found that the regret over staying silent is usually much less than the regret of blurting out something that comes back to bite me afterwards.
In a spiritual sense, I think that if your mind is constantly chattering, you’ll find it more difficult to reach the stillness where communication with yourself and god is found. For my (emotional, mental, spiritual, and physical) well-being I have to find a way to get some silence. Even if it’s filling up the bathtub and sticking my head underwater for a few minutes.
I wish I could organize my thoughts better, because I’ve been thinking about these things for awhile, but this is as good as it gets this late in the evening.
Petranef Said:
on October 11, 2006 at 8:59 am
I feel the same way you do. So much of what people say is just noise, and it falls on you and weighs you down, and makes nothing in your life better. I wish more people would actually think before they speak!
And yeah, noise is my number one stressor too. I am going to take that quote, print it out large, and staple it to the wall above my terminal at work. :)